Archive for the ‘Marriage Tips’ Category

by Iza del Carmen, MomAuthority.com

In married life the desire to go shopping, to celebrate a special day, to watch a movie or to simply dine out will arise often. It can be very difficult when these simple desires have to be set aside.

The fact is that there really is just no money available for fulfilling simple “extras”. The worse part is that the frustration could result in tempers rising and constant bickering. It is essential for couples to calmly confront this financial situation together.

Financial Difficulties

Bad credit situations and low income are often the roots of the conflicts. It can also go beyond the ordinary cash problems. There can also be struggles of the couple within themselves. That tension could grow stronger as the spouse’s fear what the future will bring, worries over their self worth, and despair over their limited means.

It is important to address this before the financial situation leads much larger problems.

Seeking Solutions

Debt is a big problem. Many families have incurred thousands of dollars of debt at one time. Fighting over money cannot be resolved by just sulking or falsely hoping to win   the lottery. The best thing to do is to give an active response to the problem.

Take action now and control the money matters. For those starting their marriage, it is necessary to avoid taking on debt. Control is the key. Married couple must take steps to spend wisely and avoid debt if at all possible.

1. Plan the budget. Allot money for the necessities and avoid any unnecessary purchases.

2. A portion of the budget should be set aside for savings. At least 5% of the monthly income should be saved for emergency purposes.

3. Live within one’s means. Do away with extravagance.

4. Cut down on expenses. For example credit card use should be limited to important purchases. Do creative activities during leisure time instead of spending on a movie movies, etc.

5. Communicate plans with your partner. It will be helpful to discuss important financial decisions with one another to make sure that both are working together to achieve their goals.

6. There are instances when experts can help by giving sound financial advice on matters when the couple is uncertain about the problem.

In a married life, problems will come and go. The only thing that matters is for couples to resolve the problem amicably. During financial conflicts, conscious effort should be given to learning the skill of handling money responsibly . Confront this situation with common sense and loving care.

by Iza del Carmen, MomAuthority.com

You may think the common problem is because he leaves the toothpaste cap half on or that she keeps on coming back with a new dent on the car.

It is a scary thought – the idea that maybe tomorrow one of you will just come up to the other and say, “I think don’t want to be married to you anymore.”

One may think they’re ready for it, but the truth is, they never are. They see it coming from a distance, but unfortunately, they were too preoccupied with the problem, they forgot to look for a solution.

And that is what is commonly happening with married couples today. There is so much anticipation on looking out for the telltale marriage trouble signs that once the problem is in your face, hardly anything is done about it.

What are these “common marriage problems” that are being talked about so often? A lot will tell you these problems fall in any of these three categories: career and finances, fidelity and personality.

Strained marriages are rocked by problems from all of these categories but the marriages that survive do so because they addressed the problem properly and looked for a solution – together.

So just how do you actually do that? It is both simple and complex.

It is simple because it just requires you to admit to yourself and to your spouse that you have a problem. On the other hand, it is complex because both of you may not agree on what exactly the problem is and the solution for it.

For both of you to reach an agreement, you must be able to both listen and articulate. Listen first to what your spouse thinks is the problem that’s driving you apart.

After he/she has said her part, then carefully tell her what’s on your mind. This act of listening and communicating then brings to both your attentions the problems with your relationship and the causes for it.

However, the both of you need to take the next step by finding a solution to the problem. This is the tricky part for it will undoubtedly require adjustment from both sides. However, simply making the necessary adjustments alone will not address the problem.

You need to find the reason why you are making these sacrifices. And that reason should be because you love your spouse and want to build on the relationship making it stronger with time.

Whether it is a problem with spending, or with who gets to hold the remote control, marriage problems can be weathered when faced together and worked on together. In time, an open toothpaste tube, or another fender bender won’t have an effect at all on the relationship.